Healthy Happy Loving Life: What Causes Your Stress?

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at choice, choices, Effective living, Kebba, living beyond, stress, Stress causes, Stress Management

© 2021 Kebba Buckley Button, MS, OM.  World Rights Reserved.

What’s stressing you out?

As a stress management expert and holistic guide, I hear people describe their stress every day. What they are usually describing are the stress symptoms, not the causes– headaches, stiff necks, back pain, legs that ache, feet that burn… the list goes on and on.  They are often grasping a body part that hurts, or rubbing points on the face.  Many of these people didn’t realize they “had stress” until something began to hurt.  Their bodies tell them when stress causes are too much.

A second group I talk with are the ones looking for strategies and solutions for the causes of their stress: conflicts, unmet needs, and circumstances.  Here’s a chart of these causes:

Stress Sources

CONFLICTS

Difficult People

Available Time vs. Needs and Goals

Available Resources vs. Needs and Goals

Personal Values vs. Values of an Authority Figure

Worry/Anxiety About These

UNMET NEEDS

Unmet Emotional Needs

Unmet Physical Needs

Pain, Chronic Health Conditions

Limited Body Mobility

Old Emotional Agendas

Feeling Limited Or Trapped

UNEXPECTED EXTERNAL FACTORS

Significant Personal Loss (Death of Spouse or Child, Job Loss)

Significant Community Loss (9/11 Attacks, Superstorm Sandy, COVID19 Pandemic)

Do you have any of these stress sources in your life?  Of course you do!  We all do.  What we need to keep in mind is that stress symptoms in the body can turn into conditions and diseases.  In Oriental medicine, this is area-specific; each emotion affects a particular part of the body.

 

Shutterstock photo

One of my mentors said this:

“Stress is probably ultimately the underlying cause of all disease.”

 –Dr. Gladys T. McGarey MD, MD(H)

Medical research has proven that stress is a factor in human health conditions, especially depression, heart disease, HIV/Aids, and some virally caused cancers. In a review of a range of medical studies, psychology professor Sheldon Cohen, of Carnegie Melon University, found two pathways by which stress might increase how sick we are.

Stress creates changes that may, in turn, cause or increase illness.

First, stressed people don’t sleep well and are less likely to take care of themselves and follow doctors’ orders.  Second, stress impacts the body’s endocrine system, which should be releasing certain patterns of hormones that affect the immune system and inflammation.  Stress creates changes that create changes that may, in turn, cause or increase illness.  Cohen found a strong relationship between stress and depression, especially in people with strong social stress factors, like a divorce or the death of someone they love.  Workplace stress and other forms of chronic stress, however, were more likely to contribute to heart disease.  Since 2000, a number of studies have also shown that there is a link between stress and HIV/AIDS.  No doubt upcoming studies will relate stress and COVID19 symptomology.

Given the Pandemic we are living with currently, it seems wise to manage our stress as well as we can, to stay as well as we can.  There are so many tools for dissolving stress and its symptoms: attitude/philosophy, developing personal peace, breathwork, diet, exercise, meditation, energy therapies. We’ll discuss those more in upcoming articles.

Stress can be costly, and this is your life!  Wouldn’t you rather be Healthy, Happy, and Loving Life^sm?  It’s up to you!  

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Kebba Buckley Button, MS, OM, is a stress solutions expert, holistic guide, and award-winning author who celebrates life.  She has a longtime energy healing practice and is an ordained minister. Among her books are: Discover The Secret Energized You (http://tinyurl.com/b44v3br), Inspirations for Peace Within:  Quotes and Images to Uplift and Inspire, and Sacred Meditation: Embracing the Divine.  The books are available on Amazon and through Kebba’s office.   To email us, kebba@kebba.com .

Books by Kebba Buckley Button

Is Your Backstory Creating More Stress?

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Kebba Buckley Button, Letting go, peace within, stress, Stress Management, your backstory

© 2015 Kebba Buckley Button, MS, OM. World Rights Reserved.

 

Fotolia

 

These days, most of us have plenty of stress without looking around for more. Many of us are caring for kids and/or elders and trying to get everyone everywhere they need to be on time, with the right gear. Many of us work in organizations with personality and philosophy conflicts. The national and international news carry many stories of plane crashes, kidnappings, mass shootings, stock market drops and rises. So do we need to dig around to find more things to be concerned, uncertain, worried, sad, mad, or depressed about?

 

 

As a stress management expert, I say no! To live a joyful, satisfying, effective life, each of us needs to be as clear in mind and heart as we can be. We need to be as healthy in our bodies and brains as we can be. Spiritual people need to be as connected as they/we can be. Today has enough to concern us without borrowing from the future or past. Even Jesus said, “[T]oday has enough troubles of its own (Matt 6:34).”

 

So why do so many cling to their unhappy backstory? I understand celebrating memories of happy childhoods, great schools, fine friends, loving pets, thrilling cities we’ve lived in, and gorgeous countryside we’ve enjoyed. This will actually raise your DHEA and make your metabolism happier. But some have bad memories they keep recounting. Whenever you hold a negative thought for a few minutes, it depresses your parasympathetic nervous system and you literally become weaker. If you sustain negative thoughts, you become more likely to get sick. But some people cling to their horror, pain, and negative imaginings as though their life depends on it. And actually, their life depends on the opposite.

 

Leave the past in the past.  Tomorrow’s not promised.  Today’s a gift.  I guess that’s why it’s called The Present.

~ Joe Budden, Hip-Hop Artist

 

Years ago, I took a self-realization seminar that lasted 5 days. Each morning the 70 participants were invited to “tell their story”, and we heard amazing tales of fabulous and horrific formative experiences. One woman said she had had an incestuous relationship with her father for a number of years (shock number one) and she said actually it had been the most supportive relationship of her life (shock number two). Another woman said her father had been a fiend and that’s why she was heavy; she was in her 50’s. Later, I realized she was running her narrative about her childhood, in her heart and mind, every hour of every day. It was creating huge mental interference and general stress.

 

On the last day, it was time for those of us who had not told Our Story to share. On the way to the seminar, it washed over me: IT DOESN’T MATTER. Since I wanted to live life forward, and actually there is no other way to live it, no aspect of stress from the past was relevant to how I lived today. For the time, when Getting It All Out was a cultural value, I was taking a radical position. It changed my life. I now mainly live my life in the present moment with an eye to the future God and I are cocreating together.

 

People have a hard time letting go of their suffering.  Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.

~ Thich Nhat Hanh

 

When someone asks you how you are, are you tempted to tell them you’re depressed or frustrated? Then you have some items to take care of.   A balanced person does not dump their stuff at the “Hello”. Write down what you’re feeling and what needs to be addressed.  Healthy people want to reach some degree of Peace Within, and peaceful people never reply to “how are you?” with negative statements.

 

Do you believe that some negative factor from your past is holding you back? If so, and if you say you want a happy and fulfilled life, it’s time to bust your backstory and get some professional help. Get some counseling, journal through the process, read any recommended books, and do any exercises the counselor recommends. If you suspect you need a prescription for anxiety or depression, start with your doctor.  When you have achieved a new balance, you may want to work on your life skills with a coach, read some books on relationships, and keep journaling. Get your eyes opened to some visions of your positive potentials and future!

 

It’s natural for people to want to improve: their health, their communications skills, their workplace talents, even their hair control. Don’t let stress from your backstory hold you back. Don’t let old stories keep you from having a satisfying day, career, and relationships. You are the only person who can put your right foot in front of your left and step forward. Create your great new life. Are you in?

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Energy – Peace – Meditation

 

 

 

 

 

 

• Kebba Buckley Button is a stress management expert.  She also has a natural healing practice and is an ordained minister. She is the author of the award-winning book, Discover The Secret Energized You (http://tinyurl.com/b44v3br), plus the 2013 book, Peace Within:  Your Peaceful Inner Core, Second Edition(http://tinyurl.com/mqg3uvc ). Her newest book is Sacred Meditation: Embracing the Divine, available through her office. Just email SacredMeditation@kebba.com.
• For an appointment or to ask Kebba to speak for your group: bookings@kebba.com .

UpBeat Living: When 19 Die for You

Tags

Firefighters, First responders, Gratitude, Grief, Hotshots

© 2013 Kebba Buckley Button.  World Rights Reserved.

 

© Bretwalda | Dreamstime Stock Photos

On June 30^th this year, a wildfire destroyed half the tiny town of Yarnell, Arizona.  It also killed 19 expert firefighters, called “Hotshots”.  One member of the team, the Lookout, survived, after warning the team the wind had shifted and himself following protocol to move to the next lookout position.  Rescuers found the 19 bodies, together with 19 fully deployed fireshields.  At this point, the fire was 0% contained.

The unincorporated town of Yarnell had around 649 residents as of the 2010 Census.  The town is northwest of Phoenix and southwest of Prescott.  This week, the entire town was evacuated due to raging fires.  The Granite Mountain Hotshots, a 20-member team out of the 92-member Prescott Fire Department, were a team specializing in fighting wildfires.  They had successfully fought back and contained a previous area wildfire.  This time, residents remember the Hotshots literally being right behind them as they fled their homes.  The Hotshots were fighting back the fire that was about to envelope, and did envelope, their homes.  The firefighters saved all the residents and half the buildings in Yarnell.  But no one could save the Granite Mountain Hotshots when a wall of fire overcame them.  Even the Pentagon dispatched special fire-fighting aircraft.

At this moment, on the evening of July 3^rd, the fire is 45% contained.  The entire town of Yarnell is in emergency lodgings. The funeral has been held for the 19. Aside from shock and grief, admiration and gratitude were the overwhelming moods of the funeral day.  There were many hugs for the surviving Hotshot, the Lookout, himself a 3-year veteran firefighter.  Those saved by the Hotshots are asking, “How can you respond when someone dies for you?”

How can we respond to this much loss?  How can we thank those who died doing what they passionately wanted to do?  How could you ever thank someone who died while saving you?  We are left with our tears, our admiration, and our questions.

 

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● Enjoyed this post?  Please click “like” in the FB widget in the right hand column!  You’ll have our undying gratitude plus a huge rise of  Good Karma.

 

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• Discover The Secret Energized You (http://tinyurl.com/b44v3br). 

 

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UpBeat Living: What Causes Your Stress?

Tags

at choice, choices, Effective living, Kebba, living beyond, stress, Stress causes, Stress Management

© 2013 Kebba Buckley Button.  World Rights Reserved.

“Stress is probably ultimately the underlying cause of all disease.”

 –Dr. Gladys T. McGarey

Photo by iStock.com

“The Mother of Holistic Medicine”, Dr. Gladys T. McGarey (M.D., M.D.H.), has said, “Stress is probably ultimately the underlying cause of all disease.”  Now, medical research has revealed that there is no longer any doubt that stress is a factor in human health conditions, especially depression, heart disease, HIV/Aids, and some virally caused cancers. In a review of a range of medical studies, psychology professor Sheldon Cohen, of Carnegie Melon University, found two pathways by which stress might increase how sick we are.

Stress creates changes that create changes that may, in turn, cause or increase illness.

First, stressed people don’t sleep well and are less likely to take care of themselves and follow doctors’ orders.  Second, stress impacts the body’s endocrine system, which should be releasing certain patterns of hormones that affect the immune system and inflammation.  Stress creates changes that create changes that may, in turn, cause or increase illness.  Cohen found a strong relationship between stress and depression, especially in people with strong social stress factors, like a divorce or the death of someone they love.  Workplace stress and other forms of chronic stress, however, were more likely to contribute to heart disease.  Since 2000, a number of studies have also shown that there is a link between stress and HIV/AIDS.

Have you ever noticed you were more tired when stressed?  Did you ever have a cold that got worse when you got bad news?  Who has experienced neck pain and headaches, when there is too much to do, or there is just too much going on around you?

Your symptoms are natural!  The body does not like negative stress!  Below is a chart of Stress Sources.   Glance over the chart and ask yourself, “when was this true for me?”  Then journal out your thoughts.

How do you react to stress, or how you have reacted in the past?

Next time, we begin a series on specific tools for beating stress, whatever the cause!  Stress is costly, and this is your life!

Figure 1.  Stress Sources

 

CONFLICTS

Difficult People

Available Time vs. Needs and Goals

Available Resources vs. Needs and Goals

Personal Values vs. Values of an Authority Figure

UNMET NEEDS

Unmet Emotional Needs

Unmet Physical Needs

Pain, Chronic Health Conditions

Limited Body Mobility

Old Emotional Agendas

Feeling Limited Or Trapped

UNEXPECTED EXTERNAL FACTORS

Significant Personal Loss (Death of Spouse, Job Loss)

Significant Community Loss (9/11 Attacks, Hurricane Katrina, Superstorm Sandy)

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● Kebba Buckley Button is a corporate stress management trainer and the author of the award-winning book, Discover The Secret Energized You, and the 2012 book, Peace Within:  Your Peaceful Inner Core.  She also has a natural healing practice and is an ordained minister.

● Your comments are welcome!

● Get these articles by email– just click the Subscribe Free option in the right column.

● Reach the writer at kebba@kebba.com .

UpBeat Living: Responding to the Massacre at Newtown

Tags

Effective living, grateful, Gratitude, Newtown, stress, Stress Management, surviving disaster

© 2012 Kebba Buckley Button.  World Rights Reserved.

Today a young man, who had planned ahead, killed 28 people in and near Newtown, Connecticut.  Adam Lanza apparently killed his mother at home, shooting her in the face.  He then went to the Sandy Hook Elementary School and killed 20 children and 8 faculty, including the much-loved principal.  In minutes, the world of these children was turned upside down.

Soon after Lanza entered the school, around 9 am, teachers and students were astonished to hear the school intercom come on, broadcasting a strong interaction between people, including swearing.  Teachers locked their classroom doors, hid children in cupboards, and in the gym, shielded the children with their bodies.  At least one teacher convinced her class there was a wild animal loose in the school, and that was the reason for cautious behavior.

After police arrived, children were cleared from the classrooms and groups began running to the nearby fire station.  Connecticut State Police began arriving in minutes, since these State Police take their police cars home and everywhere with them, for fastest response.  Today, this paid off handsomely, with an array of  dozens of sedans and trucks arriving, low-set flashing police lights bright.  ATF arrived.  Canine officers arrived.

President Obama made a short, emotional speech.  Connecticut Governor Dan Malloy met with the families.  At this hour, 10 pm Central,  a memorial Mass has already been held, with even the Pope sending a message of comfort.

We are left now with many questions.  What could possibly have been Adam Lanza’s motivation?  What could he possibly have wanted to achieve by shooting all these people, especially children ages 5-10?  Did he plan all along to end his shooting spree by ending his own life?

So how can we respond to the massacre at Newtown?  In several ways.

1. Pray, for the families of those shot today, for the investigators and the counselors, and for all those affected by all similar events.  Keep praying.

2.  Hold Go(o)d Thoughts.  Whether you believe in prayer or not, stay positive and believe that the investigators will answer the questions as fast as possible.  Believe that, with Lanza dead, this can be the last mass shooting in this country.  Are you open to that possibility?  Believe that people can and will heal in time.

3.  Get into the gun control conversation.  Follow the commentary of people like Captain Mark Kelly, astronaut husband of Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords.  Giffords was one of 19 people shot at a Tucson Safeway, almost 2 years ago; 6 of those shooting victims died.  Ask yourself where you are on these issues, and whether different gun control laws could have changed today’s outcome.  Know and speak for your position.

4.  Give thanks and hold your loved ones tight.  You get to spend another holiday season with them.  In some homes, certain chairs are empty this year.

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● Kebba Buckley Button is a corporate stress management trainer and the author of the award-winning book, Discover The Secret Energized You, and the 2012 book, Peace Within:  Your Peaceful Inner Core.  She is also an ordained minister.

● Your comments are welcome!

● Get these articles by email– just click the Subscribe Free option in the right column!

● Reach the writer at kebba@kebba.com .