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© 2015  Kebba Buckley Button, MS, OM.  World Rights Reserved.

Perfection, stress, perfection stress, shame, stress management, Upbeat Living

© Khorzhevska – Fotolia

Many people have Perfection Stress. They think they have physical or personality traits that are distracting or unacceptable to others. Some have been carrying ideas of how less-than-perfect they are, since childhood. As a stress management expert, I see this kind of self-shaming as one of the huge stressors making people tired and holding people back.  My goal is to move people into Upbeat Living, moving forward in joy and increasing enthusiasm.  Those qualities can actually dissolve stress.

 At a world-famous spa one day, I noticed a woman had toes that looked almost like mine. She could have been my foot twin! Being deeply convinced that I have adorable feet and toes, I was musing at how lucky this woman was to also have wonderful, attractive feet. As we struck up a conversation by the jacuzzi, the woman mused to me about her Ugly Toes. She had felt shame about them all her life! I said, “Oh! I think they’re great toes, really attractive!” She was stunned. I hope she reconsidered her Perfection Stress over her toes in the months following.

A number of years ago, I realized my face had become longer on one side than on the other. I was very critical of myself. I thought I looked terrible. I groomed my face carefully each day, and I did energy therapy and polarity treatments on my face. My face became more even, but I still felt ashamed of it. Then one day, my husband said, “EVERYONE has an uneven face.” Hmmm! I began studying famous people and celebrities. And guess what? Some of them are getting paid millions per year, with faces far more uneven than mine! The cameras simply shoot from the complimentary side.


Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

~ Margaret Wolfe Hungerford


Do you think your speaking is unclear? Of course, you can get voice coaching. However, today, clear speaking doesn’t matter much. There are TV stars and high-end commercial ad actors with lisps. Hate your legs? Leg shapes don’t matter. A star of the top drama on television in recent years has a bent leg. Waistlines don’t matter. A number of highly paid comedians and actors are very rotund.  Think you’re too short?  There are people of all heights making huge salaries in entertainment now.  What you can control is your excellent posture.

Years ago, I saw a fashion magazine spread featuring 5 women they called both beautiful and powerful. These women were well-groomed and made high salaries, but two of the 5 looked very unattractive, to me. That really impressed me: we all truly have different standards of beauty.

So wait! If we all have different standards of beauty, how can you groom yourself, even with the help of a plastic surgeon, so that you are seen by everyone as gorgeous? You can’t! What you can do is: make sure you have great skin and a glowing smile, that you groom your hair/face/body in ways flattering to you, and that you let your inner light beam charmingly through. Over the longer term, you can figure out what your ideal fitness and weight are, and you can craft the ideal diet and exercise program for your unique body. Do these things, and people will want to be around you, give you that job or contract, or even ask you to marry them.

Whatever flaw you think you have, maybe it’s actually perfect now. Challenge your sense of imperfection. Let your light shine: it’s always the season.  Now that’s Upbeat Living!


Energy, Peace, Meditation, stress, Peace Within, Upbeat Living

Energy – Peace – Meditation







  • Kebba Buckley Button is a stress management expert and award-winning author.  She also is an ordained minister and has a natural healing practice. Among her books are: Discover The Secret Energized You (http://tinyurl.com/b44v3br),and Peace Within:  Your Peaceful Inner Core, Second Edition(http://tinyurl.com/mqg3uvc ). Her newest book is Sacred Meditation: Embracing the Divine, available through her office. Just email SacredMeditation@kebba.com. 
  • For appointments, or to ask Kebba to speak for your group:  Calendar@kebba.com .